.

Helplessness is such an infuriating thing.
To stand there and need with all your heart to stop someone hurting, to stop something going wrong and knowing that no matter how much you care and how much you need to change things for them that you just don't hold enough sway when alls said and done points out to you that sometimes you are just helpless. There is nothing you can do.
And it hurts sometimes. It hurts to know that when you are struggling I am never going to be able to help hold you up.It hurts knowing that despite the effort I do and will always put in that I will never be the one you reach out to.
It makes a lot of sense because I have always maintained the opinion of myself that winds into this feeling of total uselessness. Maybe I am creating my own weakness.
It's selfish, too, but everyone is selfish no matter how good they are at being charitable and stuff deep down when the shit hits they are all selfish. We save what is the most important to us, the things we need. Even if its the opinions of others its still what we need to give ourselves purpose.
It's stupid to let someone else become one of your purposes, but people can't help but do it.
There are so many things I wish I could change.Times to go back to, impulses to act on, words to say.
How do you begin to accept there is nothing you can do? Should you accept it? Or should you keep trying to change things that you can't change just because of how you'd feel if you accepted it?